Can we trust our feelings or must we follow logic?
"We must always feel our feelings but we can’t always follow our feelings."
Feelings are extremely important in discovering direction and making decisions. However, sometimes feelings can make a very 'Fickle foundation' for our major decisions in life. In particular, if we have made a decision when we are emotionally unstable based on visceral perceptual filters, we may later regret the choices we made.
Whenever our emotions are unstable our thinking is irrational.
So, does that mean there is no room for visceral choices? Definitely not!
Most people who are married or in a long-term relationship would not be there if it was only based on a logical decision. Emotional choices play as much a part in the decision as logic. Personally, the best choices I have ever made when buying a car were because I had a feeling and the facts connected.
I have a magnificent Map of Australia that I bought in Bath, England for £500 and it would be worth many times that today and it was my feeling far more than logic that has it hanging on the wall in the foyer.
Most houses that people buy to live in have a high visceral content in the decision-making process.
I had one Real Estate agent say to me that people buy kitchens, bathrooms, trees, yards, sheds, garden views, spaces, accessibility, and conveniences all based on feelings. They buy the whole house because they want just a certain part of it because of the feeling it brings them.
When can we trust our feelings, and when can’t we?
The Visceral choices we make are based on the condition of our nervous system at the time we make them. Fluctuating emotions could mean that our choices are controlled by the voices or circumstances that are around us, as much as our internal voice of logic and process.
We need to be very careful when listening to opinions that alter our feelings with pressure, fear, desperation, FOM, and euphoria, as an opinion is a survey of one, and this opinion may have an ulterior motive behind it.
How can we seek good guidance for direction?
One of the key benefits of having quality peers and great mentors and coaches in our life is that we have a sounding board to externally process our thoughts and ideas.
However, I advise the people I coach to tell only a very few people about their 'Grow-up' goals. Because you only want advice from trusted people who have little bias and no agendas, and who can point you in the right direction to help you achieve your goals for your benefit.
When it comes to 'Give-Up Goals’, tell everyone.
To be sure if you have a give-up goal, something you want to get out of your life, something you want to change or give up, there will be a crowd in your life holding you accountable to prune something from your life.
Are you a Procrastinator?
Many who suffer from Procrastination have a feeling-driven attitude to setting and achieving goals. However, their feeling often leads them to the 'Paralysis of analysis.'
Their feelings are telling them “Why do something today that could be put off until tomorrow?"
Someone asked me once “ How do you get so much done?” I mentioned to them I rarely ask myself what I feel like doing and just tell myself what it is I will do.
- Do you need to tell yourself something?
- Do you need more discipline?
- Do you need to stop enquiring about your feelings first?
- Are you caught in a rut?
The difference between a rut and a grave is two feet!
Get out of the rut and get your feet pointing in the direction you want to go. Keep your feelings as a servant more than a master.
When you PlanaLife you want to want to live in there will be a mixture of feelings and determination. This is a healthy mix.
Let feelings like motivation, desire, drive, and determination have more real estate in your thinking than fear, anxiety, discouragement, and disappointment.
Have a great week and remember to Planalife you want to live in through a Business on Purpose.
Cheers, Ian.
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At PLANALIFE we help people navigate the integration of a Business and Life plan that will dovetail with marriage and family to help our clients find the very best from a balanced life.
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