How Can Your Relationship Survive Your Business – Part 4
Over the past four weeks we have been talking about our upcoming short course: How can your relationship survive your business?
We have discussed guilt and the crippling effect that it has on any relationship.
We discussed how opposites attract and then attack. What we see initially as complimentary and attractive in a friendship can be confronting and accusing in a relationship.
Then we discussed intentionally planning a life you really want to live in through a business on purpose. When your business becomes your primary focus over and above the life you want to live, you will undoubtedly become sick and tired of being sick and tired.
Today as we reach our last week, I want to discuss the ingredients of a lasting relationship. I've quoted before that 48% of all marriages end in divorce according to current ABS statistics. This doesn't account for defacto relationship breakdowns, pre-marriage bust-ups and people who live in permanent relationships where they are still together but neither person is feeling happy or fulfilled.
So what are the ingredients that make a lasting and happy relationship? We will be discussing more about this in our workshop on Monday 30th May, but here's a quick overview of the 4 key ingredients that make a relationship last:
- When love is a VERB
- Where mercy, grace and forgiveness abound
- When communication is honest and authentic
- When your “other half is prioritised”
So lets begin.
1. When love is a VERB
From your formal education days, you may remember that verbs are doing words. They are actions - not just intentions. So, love is patient and kind. It is not arrogant or rude. Love is long-suffering and gracious. Love doesn’t keep a record of wrongs but rejoices when your relationship can be restored. Love never gives up. Love isn’t fickle - it is determined. Love lasts.
We all have history, but are we carrying baggage? Is our memory full of hurt and disappointments, or love and exciting expectation? The future we embrace is directly connected to the vision we carry of what this future could be. Do you plan to have a better relationship in the future than what you currently have today? What steps are you taking to make this a reality?
2. Where mercy, grace and forgiveness abound
Mercy is not getting something we deserve for our wrongdoing.
Grace is getting something we don’t deserve for the wrong we committed, where instead of justice we receive unmerited favour!
Forgiveness is cancelling the hold you have on someone because of what they have done. You don’t carry anger, bitterness and disdain. You release yourself and the other person from an ongoing pain of an offence. You allow both of you to be free and form a future undefeated by the past. Is this easy for anyone? Absolutely not!!! However, while it is not easy - it is essential.
3. When Communication is honest and authentic
We will be working through some great tools for communication in the course but honest communication is not brutal, it is gentle and powerful together. It is expressed in love from a heart that is considering the hearer and not only the topic. I have said to people for many years, "don’t raise your voice, raise that value, clarity, and explanation of what you want to deal with". A bully or a nagger may have their partner shut up or shut down but remember, silence does not mean compliance. You may think you have won the battle but you will loose the war.
Connection comes with mutual respect, authentic tone, measured not contrived conversation and a desire to sort out an issue - not just have your own way. We arrive at compromise through compromise, and if our compromise does work you need to compromise again. (I bet you have never seen the word compromise used so much in a sentence before!)
Honesty looks forward and dishonesty looks backwards. Keep moving forward.
4. When your other half is prioritised
In marriage and relationships, I have heard the expression used many times, “We need to meet half way on this.” I think a better thing is to go all in. When I give 100% to my wife and her to me we are 'all in'. I am not holding anything back from Donna or her from me. When Donna is my priority, everything else become peripheral. When she is my focus, Donna will feel loved. When the peripheral becomes our focus then what should be our focus becomes peripheral.
There is an old proverb that states, “Wherever we place our treasure, there will our heart be also.” Most people think that where their heart is they will invest. The reality is what ever you decide to invest into your heart follows. Invest into your other half and your heart will follow. Prioritising your partner and investing in them will let you see the dividends you want in your ROI for the relationship.
Each couple who attends our workshop on the 30th May will receive a “Prepare Enrich” profile with their partner. This is an independent assessment of the two of you and allows you to have more insight into how you are going at this point in time and what are some of the important things you could work on in your relationship to help you grow personally, grow to appreciate each other more and take your relationship to a new level where you can really planalife you want to live in.
If you are married, on your wedding day you made an unconditional promise to an imperfect person! How are you going living out that promise?
If you are a newby to a relationship and this is your first time to attend this course - please register. If you are a veteran and have done the course before or been in business a long time, there is new content every year and I am positive you will take something away.
Our cost for the course is minimal at $110 inc GST per couple which is mostly the cost of the profile. I am very passionate about this course as I have seen it transform couples' relationships.
If you are in business together, if you are in a relationship where your partner is in business, I am so confident it will help you and I will offer a full refund to anyone who attends and thinks I am a load of croc!
We have seen hundreds of marriages, partnerships and relationships change when people start to approach issues and their relationship from a new paradigm and a new perspective.
I love to help people Planalife they want to live in through a Business on Purpose”™
So, if you you are ready to enjoy your business and relationship, hop on board and register.
Don’t delay! Remember there is no pleasure in procrastination!
Monday May 30th 7pm - 9pm
Address: 36 Macquarie St Bolton Point.
Registration essential through the website.
Cost $110.00 Including the Prepare /Enrich Profile.
I look forward to seeing you there! There is a limit of 25 couples. rel
At PLANALIFE we help people navigate the integration of a Business and Life plan that will dovetail with marriage and family to help our clients find the very best from a balanced life.
To achieve this, we have one focus; to see the whole person arrive where they want to be by discovering how they can proactively plan their life.
- Business owner/manager Coaching
- Executive Coaching
- Key Person Coaching
- Proactive Life Planning
- Seminars, on line training and webinars.
- Strategic Planning days
- Short Courses